Another morning waking up to ACA Hell

I wake to the pleasant light rain of a portland morning, my cat curled down by my feet.  My daughter is on her way to 8th grade, and my wife is heading to a new job.  I struggle to keep the frustration of ACA Hell out of my head while I see my daughter through her breakfast.  I struggle to keep the frustration of ACA Hell out of my head while I help my wife plan the bus trip downtown.  If I let my guard down for even a moment, the silent pitter patter of the rain, the purring of my cat, gives way to a subconscious of tight fisted anger, frustration, and depression over the fucked up situation with my health care.

I would like to live in a society where going to the doctor did not suck, was not an obstacle, and was not so damn expensive.  The reason, however, that going to the doctor is so damn expensive is health insurance.  Health insurance driven health care is a comprehensively bad idea – it is conceptually wrong and it is morally bankrupt.  Insurance is what you use to cover fringe events – it is not, nor should it ever, be used for maintenance.  Health Insurance as a vehicle for primary care is just wrong.  Listen to me you ignorant white-house fucks, it is wrong – look up the definition of insurance online – here’s what google has to say:


  • a practice or arrangement by which a company or government agency provides a guarantee of compensation for specified loss, damage, illness, or death in return for payment of a premium.
  • a thing providing protection against a possible eventuality.


It is clear that I favor the second definition, and that I think that “asking for medical advice from an experienced healer” is not a possible eventuality, i think it is my god given, inalienable human right and that insurance companies should not have a damn thing to say about it.  Barak Obama and his cohort of disconnected republicrats see it differently – they feel that I should sell my body to an insurance company to gain access to medical advice – and I have one thing to say to you barry – fuck you.

Let’s look at that first definition – someone provides compensation for a loss, damage, illness, or death in return for payment of a premium.  Ok, going to the doctor is not necessarily any of those – some times it is illness, most often and in the worst case, it is illness – but that is not always the case.  Is my frustration with the giant fuckup of the ACA an illness?  I am seeing my doctor, primarily, to cope with the stress and damage the ACA has wrought into my life – so, if I work backwards, then yes – the ACA has itself made me ill, and now I need to pay a premium so that I can get the compensation ….. wait… can’t I just pay the doctor for this help?  Do I need to be ‘compensated?’

According to that ignorant shit in the whitehouse, yes – i should not be allowed to see a doctor except via ‘insurance’, which says one of two things: 1) either the definition is inaccurate and barry is right, or 2) barry is wrong, the definition is right, and we desperately need post-ACA health care reform.  Let’s get something straight here too – the ACA effectively blocks my access to doctors, on all practical levels except in the case of ‘carcass-mechanics’.  If there is something ‘wrong’, say, an illness, then I can get compensated for the damage done by the high cost of health care.  If I merely want help coping with the obtuse legislation and the complexities of health insurance, that is not allowed because it is not an illness, it is a requirement of citizenship.  However, my state laws (OAR 410-120-1280) dictate that since I am enrolled (against my wishes) in medicaid, that it is illegal for me to see a doctor for any cause other than illness.  If I want to access health care to gain assistance coping with the idiocy of the american health care bureaucracy, that is illegal.

And let’s get it straight – i do need help.  The ACA has led me to a complete loss of faith in the united states.  I no longer believe that american democracy works.  I’ve come to loathe my country, thanks to the ACA.  The hundreds of hours of frustration, the hundreds of telephone calls, the thousand dollars I’ve spent trying to get and CoverOregon, and the HHS, and the IRS, and my state’s insurance governance, and my governor, and my state and federal senators and representatives, and the health insurers, and the private agents – that has resulted in specific physical and psychological damage.  Look – i’m just trying to get past my frustration at health care long enough to get up and get myself a morning coffee, and I struggle to do that.  I have approached the health care system for assistance coping with the ACA, but my access is blocked, by the ACA.  I very badly want to bitch slap that little shitstain in the whitehouse – i am happy to see his hair turn grey, because that means he will be dead sooner rather than later – and that kind of negativity is what the ACA is about to me.

Of course, that lying little piece of shit could have just let me keep my insurance – since I kept it anyways and am getting penalized for having insurance.  Yep – I am getting penalized, financially and physically, for having health insurance – and that just makes me want to say “fuck you barak” and “get the fuck out of my whitehouse, you deceitful little prick”.  It makes me hate every one of my congressional representatives who support the ACA – I hate republicans because they are evil, hate filled jackasses who need to get up in everyone’s business and I hate democrats because they are incompetent twits who need to get up in everyone’s business.  How can I get the government to stop protecting me to death – i do not want their help, i do not believe the federal government remains competent to govern.

My wife looks over at me before leaving for work – she sees that I am again wearing the “Health Care Frown” – she sighs in frustration, i sigh in frustration – the ACA has become a major problem between us.  She doesn’t understand why it is so difficult to have health insurance in this country – we’ve only recently moved to the u.s. and we lost access to high quality, affordable, non-insurance driven health care.  It was great.  Now, in the united states, the health care is difficult to access, ten to twenty times more expensive, and quite mediocre.  It is overpriced and driven by lawyers and bureaucrats – there is no sense of the patient or of medicine in american health care – it is carcass mechanics, pure and simple – it is overpriced carcass mechanics.  American physicians make me ashamed to be an american, almost as much as do american politicians.

Now, let’s get something clear – I have insurance, I just have the wrong kind.  The hundreds of hours and all the money I’ve spent coping with the ACA has just been trying to figure out how to communicate my insurance situation with my government and get clarity on the 1000 page mistake of a law.  I have insurance, and if it weren’t for the lies and deception at the core of the ACA, this wouldn’t be a problem – it is the dishonesty of washington, the lack of integrity of our federal government, which has caused this trouble – and, on top of that, this has done nothing but entrench the wrong kind of health care system – insurance driven health care.  It is not going to be possible to access health care without armies of lawyers and bureaucrats for the rest of my life, and it is that overhead, the paperwork overhead, which has made the united states health care the most expensive and the least satisfying in the industrialized world.

I type, with my blood pressure skyrocketing, and my body consumed by visceral anger.  I wonder if I should just buy a gun and end it – or maybe I should poison myself.  At this point, suicide to escape the health care nightmare actually sounds attractive.  My wife and daughter will be ok without me, but at least I would be free of coping with health care legislation every day of my life – which has been the case since late September, 2013, when the Obamacare onslaught caught the nation full force.  Seriously – at this point, the ACA, the idiocy and incompetence of the federal government in the rollout of what is, effectively, just a tax, has me contemplating the final solution – just to get some peace of mind.  I’m otherwise a jovial person – but the stress of the ACA, the idiocy of american health care, that is just something I’m having a hard time coping with – and, as I’ve mentioned, it is illegal for me to seek assistance in this problem – i have tried and been shot down.

Even though I generally hate republicans, because no one should give a shit whether two boys or two girls get married, and it should be person’s right to have an abortion and square that issue away with their own god, even though I’m pretty staunchly anti-republican – i am reminded of Reagan’s quote:

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are “I’m from the government, and I’m here to help.”

it’s just so true.  the federal government insists on helping me to death, on protecting me to death – and justifies lies and deception in my best interests.  Did you know that the government has twice called guns to my doorstep to try to intimidate me into stopping my fight for my individual sovereignty.  My belief that I should have access to health care is so dangerous to the ACA/Insurance cabal, that the government has seen fit to threaten me and my family (again), just so that I will fall in line and pay the tax to fund the bureaucratic obstacles to health care.  Egads – i really, really want to bitchslap that motherfucker in the whitehouse and every fucker that supported this ACA.

And another thing – i’m damn tired of hearing about the intention of the law.  What is that statement – the road to where is paved with good intentions?  And yep, that’s my situation – I’m in ACA Hell because of the good intentions of a bunch of deceitful little dipshits on the other side of the continent – and they are willing to use guns and threats of violence to maintain their righteous posture.  All I can do is face east and flip them the bird – and I can pay for my health insurance, and I can pay the new tax, and at the end of the day, I still find myself traveling overseas to get health care.

We desperately need health care reform – but we do not need the ACA.



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